Modern sport photography is all about capturing the moment, hearing the shutter click at the very instant that the ball hits the net, the coin hits the fan, the tibia goes ker-snap, or the brave England captain breaks into a courageous blub.
Hats off then to the Mirror snapper who today captured the Arsenal skipper William Gallas at the precise moment a spume of spittle connected lower to upper lip of his gaping maw, as though a phlegm spider had knit them perfectly into one. Gallas appears on at least four other back pages - the story is that he's soon to become the ex-skipper of Arsenal after gobbing off about the likes of Robin van Persie - but only one captures the story, Kevin Carter-like, in a single image of slavering perfection.
But the slobber doesn't stop there of course. The former Arsenal striker Thierry Henry has dribbled: "I really don't think so," in response to suggestions that he will join either Chelsea or Manchester City in January. And Andrei Arshavin's Mr 10%, Dennis Latcher, has aimed a come-and-get-him globule at suitors in north London by claiming "Real Madrid are in pole position" to swallow up the speedy Russian from Zenit St Petersburg.
The Blackburn manager Paul Ince is spinning a web around the Ecuador striker Cristian Benitez, and is ready to pop one straight in the eye of Wigan, who also fancy the Santos Laguna man. If Ince fails, he'll go for the Austrian Marc Janko instead.
The Swansea midfielder Ferrie Bodde will be slip-sliding into Middlesbrough in January, as the Coventry midfielder Chris Birchall will go bobbing back to his former club Port Vale on loan. Meanwhile Bolton's Gary Megson will splutter something that sounds like "Szabolcs Huszti" in a bid to sign the Hungary midfielder from Hannover.
Neil Warnock wants to take the Israel forward Ben Sahar to Crystal Palace from Chelsea, and although there's nothing saliva-related about that, in other ejaculate news the former Chelsea winger Jesper Gronkjaer has revealed that the win bonus at his new club FC Copenhagen is two bongo flicks, courtesy of the club's sex-movie distributor owners.
