I remember friends asking me before the 2004 Athens Games if I was really digging in and putting in extra miles now the Olympics were just round the corner. I wondered what they thought I’d been doing for the previous three and a half years. I also realised it’s hard to know what goes on behind the scenes and how athletes prepare for an Olympics. There are some persistent myths to dispel and new insights into how you can become the best you can be as advances in sports science challenge more traditional approaches.

There are five key areas for our athletes to hone their physical, mental and spiritual skills to thrive on and off their field of play this summer. These themes may not always feature in Hollywood scripts, though you might find some of them in Ted Lasso. Psychological insights are increasingly challenging conventional sports orthodoxy. As a bonus, these approaches will work well for the rest of us too, regardless of the size of our ambitions.

First, focus on the present. Concentrate on the session you’re in and don’t worry about the one after ahead of time. Projecting into the future is draining emotionally and distracts from making the improvements that can be made today. However much we want to win, we shouldn’t do more today than is on the training programme, whether it’s three years, three weeks or three days to go. There is a definite science-backed move away from the old macho “more must be good” approach which isn’t going “soft” but avoids burnout, overtraining, injuries and poor-quality training.

Invest in the small yet vital things that nurture your body, mind and spirit: a daily mindfulness practice to stay grounded; warm-ups and warm‑downs to look after your body; and self-compassion to accept the foibles, doubts and idiosyncrasies that confirm you’re human, however sublime the levels of performance you’re close to reaching.

Second, hang on to every scrap of perspective you can, whether that’s borrowing dogs to walk, visiting nieces and nephews, or connecting with the natural environment around you. Refreshingly, none of these care about medals. Perspective helps you to stay in the present, reduce stress and avoid catastrophising thought patterns. The sun will come up, the world will keep turning and you’ll still be the wonderfully flawed human being you’ve always been, regardless of whether you throw further, run faster or jump higher than anyone else on the planet.

Coaches, commentators, even friends may suggest that everything in your life hangs on a few minutes or seconds this summer, but that’s an unhelpful and inaccurate sporting narrative to have in your head. How you show up today and how you show up the day after your competition are just as important as how you show up on race day. The values and integrity you have shown along the way when no one was watching shape who you are come September as much as the speed and skill you show when your moment in the spotlight comes in Paris.

As the world around you zones in on those few days of competition to the exclusion of everything else, be aware that could set you up for a major crash post-Games, the now almost expected “Olympic blues”. Perspective helps to avoid that trap. Try to plan a few things for those weeks afterwards, whether it’s meeting up with friends or simply that dentist appointment you’ve perpetually postponed. There’s a gloriousness in keeping the mundane alongside exquisite heights of performance.

Third, I’m including a sports psychology cliche because it’s a good one: control the controllables. You can’t influence what your competitors are doing, you can’t determine where luck will fall, and you can’t predict what will happen. So don’t waste precious energy ruminating on that.

A psychologically savvy “performance mindset” centres less on winning and proving yourself better than others, and instead focuses much more on constantly improving and executing your race plan to your highest potential. This doesn’t mean there’s less desire to win but acknowledges we can’t fully control or guarantee the result. Our best option is to refocus our attention on to all the aspects of the performance process that we can control, whether it’s executing a technical movement or tuning into our strengths to draw on.

Fourth, connect to others. You’re not alone on this journey so reach out for help when you need it. Don’t cut yourself off. Looking back, I did that to my detriment: feeling no one else could understand the turmoil of emotions of expectations and excitement, fears and doubts. But staying close to the people in your life who support and love you whether you finish first or last is crucial. They’ll be the ones you reminisce with in years to come, as that lovely medal sits in a sock drawer gently tarnishing, or as those nagging memories of a yearned‑for medal softly fade.

Be grateful that you get to feel truly alive in a way many others have never experienced and appreciate this incredible opportunity to explore your mental and physical capabilities in a way you’ve been dreaming about for much of your life. Positive psychology interventions with athletes have proven that gratitude improves mental and physical health, increases social connection, life and sport satisfaction, team cohesion and lowers levels of burnout. That’s a good step on from Rocky’s competition mindset.

Finally, tell your own unique story. You’re not “the next Usain Bolt” or “the next Laura Kenny”. Think about what you want to be remembered for on and off the track: who do you want to be when the nerves kick in and the pressure ramps up, when luck falls with or against you, when your teammates call on you to step up? The answer doesn’t need to be some all‑conquering hero, simply the best version of you drawing on your incredible strengths, ready to write the next chapter of your own journey that’s led to this point. A summer of incredible stories awaits.

• Cath Bishop won a silver medal in the coxless pairs at the 2004 Athens Olympics. The Long Win by Cath Bishop (Practical Inspiration Publishing, £14.99). To support the Guardian and Observer, order your copy at guardianbookshop.com. Delivery charges may apply