Everybody has been laughing at the Waratahs following their slapstick performance against the Blues on the weekend. And for good reason. It was without doubt Super Rugby's greatest LMFAO moment, a rhapsody of untold handling errors intercut with superb attacking play, the highlight of which was Jacques Potgeiter landing the motherload of all falcons flush on Will Skelton's noggin from a line-out deep in the Blues' half. It nearly knocked the poor bloke out.
On another day, the Tahs might have racked up 40 points plus against a mentally suspect Blues outfit. The Tahs had them well beaten with their attacking play. Cue the chopper attack scene from Apocalypse Now with Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries blaring, but in the Tahs' version the helicopters spin out of control and crash into palm trees shortly after take-off. Alas, 16 handling errors from poor decision-making, low-percentage passes and comical offloads – including a howler from Sekope Kepu who was hooked shortly thereafter and has been dropped this week – saw them leave Eden Park without even a losing bonus point. And, adding insult to injury, the Tahs surrendered second spot in a congested Australian conference to the Western Force. Tahs coach Michael Cheika responded in the most human of ways post-match – he laughed. "Maybe they think they're the Harlem Globetrotters, I don't know," he said.
But here's the really funny thing about the Eden Park fiasco – look closely at the opening 20 minutes, and there's a powerful insight with huge implications for Wallabies selection: Kurtley Beale, Adam Ashley Cooper and Israel Folau operate brilliantly as a unit. They combined beautifully in fluid attacking play, carving up the Blues virtually at will and only went without reward because of a bad case of the fumbles, many of the dropped balls unforced and uncharacteristic. This trio represent a lethal ‘axis of evil’ for opposition sides that Test selectors would be foolish not to exploit at international level.
The only Test selection concern with the KB-AAC-Izzy attacking unit – and Cheika's concern too for the remainder of the Super season – might be Ashley Cooper who is instinctively an untrusting player on attack when it comes to his outside support. He's always been that way. However, he has been more giving to his partners in recent games and Beale and Folau appear to be coaxing him along.
The KB, AAC, Izzy combination implications for Test selection paradigms are clear: do selectors pick the best players in their positions and instil in them game plans for various oppositions? Or do they pick a team of combinations to exploit the seemingly limitless talent of full-back Folau, and develop variations on game plans all of which have him at its core? These are crucial questions that need to be answered with a degree of finality with the World Cup just over a year away. It's now time to cut the cloth and double down on selection concepts. This columnist advocates the second approach – pick a team to unleash Folau on the opposition. That means an axis of Beale at second five-eighths, Ashley Cooper at centre and Folau at the back. Consequently, there's no room for Quade Cooper at fly-half. That position has to go to Matt Toomua operating in tandem in another well-oiled combination with Nic White at half-back.
Cooper's omission shouldn't be viewed as form-related notwithstanding the Reds' poor season thus far and some recent and considered observations by Wallaby great Mark Ella. It comes back to the KB, AAC, Izzy axis, particularly with Beale becoming more vocal and dominant as a backline play-caller and play-maker. Like all great magicians, they do their best work as solo acts. Beale doesn't need Cooper alongside him conjuring rabbits. That pairing in such close proximity will disrupt the team's attacking harmony with competing and conflicting trickery. The magic wand has to be waved wider out with Beale running the cutter on decisions to bring Ashley Cooper and, more importantly, Folau into play. To that end, the Wallabies will need a fly-half with a calm head who does the basics very well – kick re-starts, clearing for touch, and making one-on-one tackles – and who knows how to nuance his play as part of a greater ensemble piece featuring Beale, Ashley Cooper and Folau. That man is Toomua. For all of Cooper's undeniably genius, too often it's his execution of the basics under pressure that has let the Wallabies down. Sadly, alongside long-time halfback partner Will Genia, he is now surplus to requirement. Folau's coming has changed everything.
Talking points
• Finally, the Brumbies have laid to rest the demons of last year's Super Rugby final when they had the Chiefs beat but for the final 15 minutes. Oh how times have changed. The ACT team's emphatic 41-23 thumping of the Chiefs has confirmed what many astute observers already knew – the Brumbies are the best side in the comp and the Chiefs are in decline and at long odds for a title three-peat. It will be interesting to see if the Brumbies have a letdown against the Crusaders in Christchurch this weekend though. The Crusaders are nothing special other than a famous rugby brand on 2014 showing. But, and it's a big but, Richie McCaw is back.
• The Sharks would be doing some serious soul searching after slipping up at home against the Highlanders. We'll get a more accurate take on the Sharks with the side hitting the road for the first time this week. First up are the Rebels who are anything but cannon fodder these days. They've already beaten the Brumbies this season and would fancy their chances against the Sharks in Melbourne on Friday. Especially if the Sharks are looking one match ahead to their clash with the Brumbies in Canberra on May 10. Expect standing room only for that epic with the delicious subplot of Jake White's first trip back to Canberra since cutting and running on his contract last year after losing the Wallabies job to Ewen McKenzie.
• If the Tahs' Eden Park comedy wasn't sufficiently off the wall, how's this: the Hurricanes are top of the New Zealand conference. Yes, that's right, the Hurricanes, a team so out of sorts at the start of the season that the coach Mark Hammett sacked himself. They haven't lost since. Truly bizarre. The 'Canes, mind you, only played – and thumped – the Reds to snare top spot from the Chiefs though. The comp’s leading comic acts – the Tahs and 'Canes – playing this weekend could provide the game of the season. The tragedy is likely to be the Blues v Reds match at Eden Park. It’s time for the Reds to plan for 2015.
Super Rugby round 11 results: Blues 21 d Waratahs 13; Brumbies 41 d Chiefs 23; Highlanders 34 d Sharks 18; Hurricanes 35 d Reds 21; Force 15 d Bulls 9; Cheetahs 35 d Stormers 22.
