It has often been said that Sir Alex Ferguson could start an argument in an empty room. While that has yet to be conclusively proven, the Manchester United manager's trenchant criticism of facilities at other Premier League clubs yesterday confirmed he finds it perfectly easy to start an argument about one.
Possibly bored in the knowledge that he will not see Arsène Wenger for the best part of a week, or hear word from Rafael Benítez for at least another 24 hours, Ferguson has picked a fight with clubs which have small dressing rooms – with the Scot calling on the Premier League to act immediately and introduce rules stipulating minimum sizes.
"With all the money in the Premier League, some grounds should be better," Ferguson told his club magazine, Inside United. "There should be a minimum standard of size of dressing room, especially now you have more players on your bench and an increased staff.
"You have requirements for stadiums to be eligible for certain divisions, so the quality of the dressing room should be part of that."
Ferguson reserved the bulk of his ire for the changing facilities at three of the Premier League's more traditional grounds: Goodison Park, Fratton Park and Craven Cottage. "Everton's are so narrow it is unbelievable," he blasted. "Portsmouth's away dressing room is not great and the one at Fulham is smaller than my office.
"Craven Cottage is a very traditional stadium and one of my favourite away grounds, but when you have 18 players stripping down, plus coaches, physios and kit men, it is ridiculous really."
The palatial surrounds of Old Trafford would, according to Ferguson, offer the Premier League a perfect blueprint for any dressing-room-dimension diktat, and the spanking new environs of Arsenal's Emirates Stadium – where his team will be next week for their Champions League semi-final – are held up as the best of the rest.
"There is plenty of room in the dressing rooms at Old Trafford and, of the away grounds, Arsenal's are the best by far," said the 67-year-old, perhaps mindful that the further he finds himself from a changing-room wall, the less likely he is to throw a teacup at it.
