THE DYING OF THE LIGHT
As an entity, Football Daily peaked in the noughties when young and still hopeful of living a long and successful life. We were rarely happier than seeing Emile Heskey bang in England’s fifth against Germany or Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff inspiring that Ashes victory. Those memories occasionally slip from the mind but we are desperate to cling to the days when the beer gut was in the experimental stage, the hair thicker and state-owned clubs a long way off.
Sadly, there are now constant reminders of how long ago this all was, mainly in the form of the offspring of the famous sportspeople we once idolised now being professionals in their own right. Manchester City have Jaden Heskey on their tour of the USA USA USA, a country where 14-year-olds are playing in their highest domestic league, while Rocky Flintoff made his Lancashire county cricket debut aged 16 on Sunday. It is truly upsetting that these people with impeccable genes are entering the world of sport. Football Daily Jr will be pleased that it will not take long to exit their parent’s shadows. The only thing it received from their father was vouchers for a free Nando’s and a basic understanding of planning law, which is useless in the wider world.
Even Big Sports Day cannot provide a distraction from our own mortality and mediocrity. Team GB’s George Mills is running both the 1500m and 5,000m, distances it would take Football Daily a day or two to cover at least. It turns out he was born to be industrious as the son of energetic – but often out-of-position – full-back Danny Mills, who was still being paid by Manchester City in 2009. It is fine that this lad is doing his bit to earn some silverware to go with his dad’s Coca-Cola Cup medal but to find out he is 25 is irritating, like our bowels.
But here we are in 2024, acknowledging our age, while that former wonderkid Wayne Rooney is already on his fourth club as a football manager. Our youth, meanwhile, remains unindulged, however much we pretend that a goal at five-a-side could be the springboard required to earn a Premier League contract or seeing that girl from school who never spoke to us but liked our photo on Instachat might result in marriage. We will pass our failed ambitions to the next generation, the ones with talent and merited aspirations, who will hopefully go on make an old email very happy. Make us feel young again, Jaden et al.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
When I’m leaving, I will say I’m leaving, but I didn’t say that. We will see what happens. But I will not rule it out absolutely to extend my contract. I would love to stay because I would love to stay” – uh, oh, has Pep Guardiola gone all Jordan Belfort on us? Good news for Manchester City supporters and bad news for fans of competitive title challenges beckons.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
The football season is around the corner and therefore Football Weekly is back from its brief hiatus. Max Rushden is joined by Barry Glendenning, Lars Sivertsen and Jonathan Wilson to discuss who should replace Gareth Southgate as England manager and make some early predictions.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
No point. Why? Woke newspaper. Climate fuc [snip – Football Daily Letters Bad Word Ed] nonsense, etc. Fuc [snip – FDLBWE] off. Regards” – Jim Lucy.
Re: Friday’s Football Daily. Scotland, of course, voted against Brexit and so didn’t wait for Labour taking power to maintain good relations with our European brethren. While Lewis Ferguson has been a revelation at Bologna, he didn’t start the biggest Scozzese invasion since Italia ’90. Midfielder Liam Henderson moved from Celtic to Bari aged 21 in 2018 and in 2019 became the first Scot to play in Serie A since Graeme Souness. In 2021-22 Henderson played every game in Empoli’s Serie A campaign. Aaron Hickey moved to Bologna aged 18 in 2020 and made the right-back position his own despite being a left-back. Josh Doig, another left-back, moved from Hibs to Verona aged 20 in 2022 and also took to it like a duck to water. Not that Steve Clarke noticed any of this as the four young trailblazers have won just 12 caps between them while playing in Italy, despite playing a combined 200-plus times in Serie A. Someone – maybe Che Adams if he wants to continue his Scotland career – should tell Clarke that EasyJet do flights to Italy for about 20 quid” – R Mathison.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day winner is … Jim R Mathison. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
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