Time to draw a veil over this non-event. Thanks for your company and correspondence on everything from the meteorology of Manchester to betting on Travis Head’s sixes. It’s been about as much fun as it could have been.

Do join us on Thursday for the first of five ODIs between England and Australia. It starts at 12.30pm BST at Trent Bridge, so the OBO will be in action from 11.30am. And Harry Brook will be making his debut as England captain (see 14:25 below). Hope your evening goes better than the afternoon, and I’m going to leave you with a sentiment we can all share.

From Bath, where it’s sunny apparently, comes this unexpected take from Patrick Tyson-Cain. “When Hitchcock’s incomparable gem The Lady Vanishes gets plonkingly remade (inevitably, just as something as unnecessary as The Hundred was always going to happen – well, for a few years),” he wonders, “what crucial match at Old Trafford will the new Charters and Caldicott be single-mindedly braving Balkan bullets and sinister fascists to reach (or at least discover the result of)?

“Could it perhaps be the decider – just like today’s – in a 3-match T20 series? Possibly as terminally rain-sodden as the Test in the original TLV? Depends on the other interests of the company that owns the relevant studio, I suppose.

“Of course, there’d be no need to stick to cricket, I suppose. Could be the European paddle-boarding cup, or a Royal grouse-shooting contest, or a combination of the two.

“Anyway, thanks for everything, Tim & Graun.”

Bert Stewart (15:30) is back with a stream of consciousness. “Eeek, covers came off then back on again,” he writes. “Do you cut or run. Prospect of a reduced overs match is exciting. Was at first ever tied T20 international between NZ and WI at Eden Park. Super over with Chris Gayle for one side and Brendon McCullum for the other. Awesome mayhem… aaargh… just popped up that match abandoned.”

I don’t want to get anybody’s hopes down, but our friends at Cricinfo are all but writing the game off. “This is totally doomed,” their person at the ground, Matt Roller, has just reported. “Umbrellas up, rain sweeping through, all covers back on.”

“Sitting here in my safe air-conditioned horribly humid Caribbean home (as The Clash never sang),” says Adam Roberts, “all the emails about the weather being the way it is because it’s mid-September raise a wry smile.

“It’s Manchester, where I lived for some years. It can rain at any time. Consecutive games in Cardiff, then Manchester – two traditionally, notoriously wet and rainy cities is like throwing down the gauntlet and daring the weather gods.”

Up to a point, Lord Roberts. The only Test match I ever covered that was abandoned without a ball being bowled was in Georgetown, Guyana. Some of the worst weather in the cricket world these days is in Sydney. And you’d still schedule matches in both of those places, wouldn’t you?

“I’d just like to apologise,” says Ken Andrew, “to those fellow England supporters seated near us on Friday night in Cardiff.” You’ve got me wondering what for. “For myself and my two lads making a lot of whooping and a’hollering when Travis Head put Australia’s third six – one in each of the first three overs – into the crowd.

“In the car heading to the match my youngest was reading out the odds being offered for this feat when I asked him to put £5 on. He doubled this up to £10. The odds were 67/1.

“For 670 smackeroos I can live with the shame of cheering an Australian.”

A development, of sorts. There will be an inspection at 4.15pm, in just over 40 minutes. Good old England.

“Been here for over two hours now,” says Bert Stewart. “The puddle in the outfield has definitely shrunk considerably, so I reckon a T3 is definitely on.” Ha.

“Surely,” says Meghan Purvis, “there’s a way we can blame this weather on The Hundred (or, as some of us prefer to call it, the T16.4)? I’m mostly in jest, but really, the county season started in April and ended in September; in a British climate that’s just asking for this kind of thing.”

“Dumb person question,” says David Bersham. “We played the World Cup in the US (was fantastic) and also in the wet season at some fantastic storied grounds in the Caribbean. And now England-Australia is being played in late September. Lads, what’s the plan?” Ha.

David Ledsham’s email brings an instant retort. “Not cold for Glos fans, I’ll wager!” says Andrew Benton with a chuckle. “Their first T20 Blast trophy yesterday, jolly good indeed. Perhaps the three other finals day contenders all had finishing top of the table on their minds, but that doesn’t lessen the truly great performance by the Shire.” Absolutely. Gloucs took 20 wickets in the day and lost only four.

Personally I don’t believe in finals day – for the fans, one of the best things about your team being in a final is surely the chance to spend a couple of weeks looking forward to it, not to mention the chance to plan the trip. But if we have to have it, that’s the way to play it.

“What a shame the Manchester weather has struck again,” says David Ledsham, “but then what should we expect when 1st class cricket gets relegated to Spring and Autumn in order to accommodate The Hundred. If it’s not wet it’s cold. As witnessed by the crowd in their winter woollies at Cardiff.

“I was at the Vitality Blast Finals yesterday (that used to be a July fixture) and even though it was a nice day, by the time the main event got underway it was decidedly chilly. By the end it was definitely cold.”

To be fair to The Hundred, a big reason why England’s home international season has run so late this year is the timing of the T20 World Cup, which hogged the whole of June. And wasn’t the County Championship pushed into spring and autumn even before the Hundred came along?

We’ve already lost at least half an hour of this game and probably more. There is an extra hour that can be added on at the end, which means play can go on till 6.40pm if I’ve read the regulations right.

Meanwhile I’ve been trying to work out how England’s ODI team will now line up. Something like this, at a guess: 1 Phil Salt, 2 Will Jacks, 3 Jordan Cox. 4 Harry Brook (capt), 5 Liam Livingstone, 6 Jamie Smith (wk), 7 Jacob Bethell, 8 Brydon Carse, 9 Jofra Archer, 10 Adil Rashid, 11 Reece Topley.

That might be a bit harsh on Ben Duckett, but it’s hard to leave out Livingstone when he’s in the form of his life. If the pitch was green, they could do with a fourth seamer, though that would mean pushing Carse up to No.7. They’ve picked lots of batters who bowl spin (Jacks, Livingstone, Bethell) and no seamers who are comfortable in the top seven, such as Sam Curran. Or even Tom Curran.

If you’ve never sent us an email, now would be a good time. Or even if you’re a regular.

Permission to switch to the football. Our MBM is being supplied by Rob Smyth, another legend in his own live-blog. “Spurs,” he reported a few minutes ago, “are all over Arsenal.”

In search of some local expertise, I texted Tanya Aldred, the live-blog legend who lives within walking distance of Old Trafford. “Pissing it down,” she pithily replied. “V unlikely I’d say.”

It’s not raining cats and dogs – it’s worse than that. Which is even more of a shame than usual as this game is live on BBC1.